What do you do about bad chemistry with your supervisor?

: 09.04.2025

As many as 135 students filled Studenterhuset's concert hall in Aalborg when the student association SoFia welcomed them to an evening in true Sara & Monopolet style. The evening's monopolists discussed dilemmas about everything from bad chemistry with a supervisor to the question of where to draw the line for infidelity, and for the students in attendance, it became clear that they share many of the same challenges.

What do you do about bad chemistry with your supervisor?

: 09.04.2025

By Matilde Albrektsen, AAU Kommunikation og Public Affairs
Translated by LeeAnn Iovanni, AAU Communication and Public Affairs
Photos: Matilde Albrektsen

For the evening’s event, the mayor of Aalborg Municipality, Lasse Frimand Jensen, had replaced the city council members with a large group of problem-solving AAU academic staff from the Faculty of Social Sciences and Humanities (SSH) who did their best to navigate the students' dilemmas. Mayor Lasse Frimand Jensen was asked about his experience in solving dilemmas.

"Yes, as mayor, I deal with dilemmas almost daily – both political and personal. It can be anything from budget priorities to balancing different interests within the municipality. So I’m used to think in nuances and finding the right balance."

The monopoly panel

Lasse Frimand Jensen – Mayor of Aalborg Municipality
Rasmus Antoft – Dean, SSH
Morten Kyed – Associate Professor, Lecturer in Sociology
Janne Seeman – Professor of Organizational Sociology
Annette Olesen – Associate Professor, Lecturer in Criminology
Rolf Lyneborg Lund – Associate Professor, Lecturer in Sociology
Jakob Skjøtt – Associate Professor, Head of Department
Hanne Louise Jensen – Associate Professor, Lecturer in Sociology
Rasmus Munksgaard – Associate Professor, Lecturer in Criminology
Berith Heien Lauridsen – Teaching Associate Professor, Lecturer in Social Work
May-Britt Søndergaard Justesen – Teaching Associate Professor, Social Work
Nadir Salam Naji Al-Manawi – Teaching Associate Professor, Social Work

Attracted to someone in their programme

Two of the evening's dilemmas in particular piqued the interest of the students in attendance. The first came from "Preben" who has a girlfriend but who also feels attracted to someone in his programme. "Preben" says that they have good chemistry and perhaps they flirt a little too much. He feels it borders on cheating, and is thus unsure whether he should distance himself, admit it to his girlfriend, or whether he should just enjoy the excitement.

This was where disagreement and debate arose in monopolet.

"You have to make a choice. What horse do you want to bet on? Are you into your partner, or are you into flirting; you have to figure that out," said Berith Heien Lauridsen, Teaching Associate Professor and Lecturer in Social Work.

Annette Olesen, Associate Professor and Lecturer in Criminology, did not agree:

"I disagree. I once heard Mads & Monopolet, and I can't remember who it was of the monopol participants who said that a flirtation in your programme or at work makes you so damn beautiful, and I believe that."

Bad chemistry between student and supervisor

Another dilemma that particularly resonated with the students was the bad chemistry between "Henrik" and the project group and their supervisor. "Henrik" wondered whether the bad chemistry could affect the project process and their grades, and wanted advice on what they could do in such a situation.

The monopolists all agreed that supervisors are professional enough to distinguish the personal from the professional.

A student then interjected with a concern about a supervisor who could not remember their names. To this, Janne Seeman, Professor of Organizational Sociology, quickly replied that they often have several hundred students and thus many names to remember.

Hear students' reactions to monopolet and the dilemmas

Katrine Tang, Sociology, 4th semester and Nicolas Holdt, Sociology, 4th semester

Was there a specific dilemma that particularly made an impression on you, and why?

Katrine Tang: "The dilemma about whether the chemistry with the supervisor affects your grade, because I think it’s something we can all relate to, and it’s a concern we all have, because we want to do well; there were also some interesting reflections from monopolet, so that stuck with me a lot at least."

Nicolas Holdt: "I specifically think that having an uneven relationship with a supervisor is something I’ve experienced myself. I had the same supervisor two semesters in a row and had a different relationship and a completely different chemistry with this supervisor from one semester to the next, and it was very interesting to hear about it from other people in the system."

Do you recognize any of the dilemmas?

Katrine Tang: "Well, pretty much all the questions apply to our lives in one way or another, I think, and it's also students who we can see ourselves in who asked these questions, so I think that overall all the questions made an impression on me at least."

Do you think monopolet deals with the dilemmas well?

Katrine Tang: "I think they’re doing really well. They have a few more years on us, they are wise, and they are smart, and they can lead us confused souls a little in the right direction, so overall they just do it really well."

Nicolas Holdt: "An advantage of the monopolists is that they are from different disciplines, even though it’s in the social sciences, [...] So you get a bit of a holistic understanding plus several different perspectives on the same topics."

Katrine Zimmer Fauerholt Jensen, Sociology, 2nd semester

Was there a specific dilemma that particularly made an impression on you, and why?

"I think what we just had about where the line is between flirting and cheating, and how they handled it, also because it's something that's getting harder and harder to assess, because a message can be interpreted in many ways, like whether or not there are smileys, and things like that. It's not just a line in the sand that says this and that anymore."

Do you think monopolet deals with the dilemmas well?

"I think it's good that they don't agree, because it's a real dilemma, and it's also about the fact that the person who asked it can't find the answer themselves, and it's not even certain that there is an unambiguous answer, but maybe it’s about looking a little inward and then saying: Where do I really stand morally on this, and is it okay to prioritize myself. It's sometimes nice that someone else tells you where you should put your efforts."

Caroline Nielsen, Sociology, 2nd semester

Do you think monopolet deals with the dilemmas well?

"I think they are really good at dealing with these dilemmas and respond very well, and then the fact that they have different opinions on it, so they can also say, well, I deeply disagree with you, and then you sit there and laugh a little about it. And the fact that there are so many different people who can answer means that you get more input on the same thing. I think that's really good."